S a l e m (expertofthesand) wrote,
S a l e m

And I'll tell you why.

I guess I was right - you really aren’t talking to me anymore. You know, I think you’re a shitty a friend for this. Even if you did have some kind of problem with me I guess it’s a crazy assumption but I figured you would have the decency to let me know. Or at least tell me why I deserve this kind of treatment. I’ve been there for you. Whenever you needed me and no matter what crazy time it was, I’d go out of my way to be there. Remember those times you’ve called me crying sometimes three in the morning and I came over right away? Or how about that time you were depressed and I stayed with you all night to make sure you were okay? I guess those times I’ve been there doesn’t mean much. This kind of treatment actually makes me feel a little worthless to you. I thought you were really my friend. Someone who I can talk to about anything, someone I knew everything about and could be myself around – vise versa. We’ve been best friends since the second grade. That kind of connection is so hard to find, and I know I’ll never have it with anyone else. Sometimes you felt closer to me than my own sister was. I’d never wish anything bad on you, but I’m sorry I had to get so close to someone as selfish as you. Like I said this kind of treatment makes me feel worthless, but I’m not worthless. I’m in school and doing amazing when I actually show for it, and I’m not quitting until I make something of myself – until I’m successful and actually mean something. I can feel it. You, on the other hand, who knows where your stop will be – you’re lazy, selfish, egotistical, stubborn, you care about no one other than nummero-uno and have this strange obsession with a cannabis plant. You can’t even remember what you did last year because you were too busy putting shit up your nose. You’re insanely jealous and have psychological issues that no one really knows about because they can’t see past your anger issues. You take and take but hate to pay your dues. You steal from those you call friends and turn your back on them when they’re sinking. Don’t get me wrong, I still love you like I always have despite all this. I was the only one that has stuck up for you when other people would talk about these things, about what a horrible person you’ve grown up to be. I would say that you’ve had it rough. That we’ve all had it pretty tough and you have a different way of dealing with it all, that you have your moments but people just have to know you better to see the real you. I guess this is my reality check. I’ve grown a lot over these years and I’m a little surprised you’re still stuck in the fascisms of high school. I wish I would have seen who you are earlier or at least believed what I already knew. You’re a user leeching off of everyone around you. And one day you’re going to need a friend to be on your side and it won’t be me. I’ve come to believe what kind of person you prove you are every single day and to be honest.. I can’t stand people like you.

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